December/January Life Update – Discomfort

Standard

Hello to you & 2017, it’s been a while.

This was going to be both a life update & a reflection of 2016, but the reflection kept growing & growing. Dividing this into three posts seems more humane, which I’ll space out over the next few days. My other excuse for the absence is that I’ve become more lazy & distracted since the Christmas & New Years period.

So, the main things that have happened:

  • My part-time contract ended on December 23rd & I’ve received news my boss’ higher ups will not employ me at this time for legal reasons. Fortunately my boss is willing to help get me setup as a “self-employed” contractor just so he can hire me back himself. I just need to get setup with WINZ again & go from there. 2017 is going to be rather interesting since I know nothing about being self-employed or being a contractor (yay?).
  • I actually found a boardgame I’ve been wanting to play for a long time – Tales of the Arabian Nights (this review serves as good insight into what the game is like). I love this game, I wish I had it when I was younger. It’s one of the inspirations for the prototype I’ve been working towards, & now that I’ve actually played it I’ve been reconsidering some of my design choices so far. Good thing I’m still in the planning phase.
  • I’ve had my brother come down & stay at my flat in late December through to New Years, though we stayed in Te Anau with my parents for Christmas. Seeing family & the dogs has been nice but it left me in a subdued mood. This feeling seems to have passed though I still find myself stuck with questions.

I remember that for much of my Christmas & New Years break I couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable. I kept having a sense of past dynamics recurring in a modern incarnation, & I kept perceiving subtleties in some of them I didn’t like. Stepping outside of my typical life bubble & being in the presence of family with differing perspectives has also brought about hard questions that I’m still struggling to answer, & revealed my own troubling subtleties. This feeling was so prominent that I couldn’t even allow myself to work on my prototype.

I’d become derailed again – getting really sick of that. I actually don’t know if I have the heart to examine this further (again, the emotions from that have largely passed from my consciousness). I’ve already done a lot of writing as it is, & my next post touches on the questions I’m struggling with.

Farewell.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s